My Journey To Wholeness

I’ve always been a “do whatever the hell I want” kind of girl. 

Always doing what my heart wanted to do which has gotten me into a lot of trouble in life, but also created a life full of incredible experiences.

Some good, some not so good

At 19 I started stripping

It was the most awesome experience a 19 year old could have

I regained all the confidence I had lost after being sexually abused and in a very manipulative relationship

I got taken on experiences people only dream of with people, other people dream of meeting

I learned so much about my body working at a strip club.

I got to explore how to use my body. How to play with my sensuality and use this force to make more money than I thought possible by being myself and getting spoiled as hell

I saw how powerful this energy was, this thing I possessed. The thing I saw other women possess. It was raw and potent. It was empowering and life giving and it also had this magickal healing over men. It was like this thing they wanted and searched for would make all the problems in their life disappear. These big CEO’s and businessmen became putty in your hands because they felt this power. These men who were so hard and closed off would open up in a way that you could just see the lightheartedness in them and they would give you anything and tell you everything. Secrets that would destroy their entire life, but they didn’t care because they had this thing and that’s all they wanted 

I had to learn more about it

After years of playing in the sex world, from stripping, cam girling, sugar baby, to dominatrix I had mastered the game. I could look at a guy and knew exactly what he wanted and completely embody that to get what I wanted 

It was all too easy and I became hooked. Hooked into the lifestyle, the parties, the drugs, the money, the everything. I exploited this sacred power I once had and it turned toxic

I was traveling between New York and LA living the life I wanted all because I had something that these men wanted and I could dangle it in from of them and they gave anything they had for it

And no I’m not just talking about sex, it’s more than sex. Anyone can have sex. People pay for sex all the time, but what makes someone spend thousands of dollars on you compared to a couple hundred? What makes a man give you everything they have over someone else whose younger, prettier, thinner? 

It’s sensuality. 

It’s that full body erotic energy that a woman has when she is so connected to every part of her body. She knows how to move every single inch of her body in a way that is so enticing, so seductive, so graceful that it will put you in a trance. 

It is the most beautiful energy when used for connection, love, healing but the most toxic energy when used for manipulation, control, greed. 

And this once beautiful thing I possessed became the most damaging thing in my life, which caused bad things to happen.

I got stuck in a spiral of toxic relationships and a toxic lifestyle but it was what was comfortable and I was still getting whatever I wanted so I saw nothing wrong. So I continued exploiting this side of me to make money and get what I wanted

Then I got into one final super toxic abusive relationship and it was like everything I had been hurt by in the past all wrapped up into one relationship to show me what the fuck are you doing? But the universe always has balance. So as horrible as it was it was amazingggg. Everything I thought I ever wanted and I was able to look past all the bad because the good was just so damn good. 

At this point I was completely shut off from my body. It was like that raw sensual force I had got turned on auto pilot because I knew how to use it so well. I knew exactly what to do to get what I wanted but this sensual energy got taken advantage of so many time it became something that I was trying to protect myself from.  I was cut off from my essence, my body, and my light.

My body felt numb, I was so disconnected. If I touched my leg really gently I felt nothing, my sex life was basically me performing for the other person, I would have pain while having sex like someone was stabbing me in the pussy with a knife, my body just started shutting down, my light was dimming, my essence going away and I could see it in my face. Even my smile changed it didn’t go up at the ends it went down. My body was SCREAMING at me with everything it had to tell me I was disconnected but I couldn’t hear it.

I had lost the very essence of my sensuality.

And life felt really hard. Nothing was working out and I couldn’t figure out why

One day I started learning about tantra, goddesses, and feminine healing- and holy shit this gave a name to all the things I had been learning about since 2011. I had heard it come up many times throughout the years when I was learning about other healing modalities, but I hadn’t dove into it on my own. 

And I realized… I have so much stuff I need to heal! 

I dove in and started the practices and reading everything I could. I spent hours each day meditating and hours at night doing the practices. I completely shut myself away from the outside world and it was incredible… and scary. 

The things that were coming up, I had never looked at and forgot mostly about because they were so traumatizing. Everything began to come to the surface and I was paralyzed with fear. Anything that reminded me of that would re traumatize me and I saw anyone who would remind me of that person who did that to me as someone to fear. 

I ran so hard from my sensuality I was afraid of it. I thought it was because of this power I was fucked up and would never heal. 

But I needed to see what else was inside me so I continued doing the work. I stepped back from tantra and just focused on goddess meditation especially on my womb. I learned about the history of so many powerful goddesses and what they ignited in women. 

These goddesses healed me in a way that I never knew possible. Healed my body- healed my womb.

Ohhh my womb. I created the most loving relationship with my womb and my heart which lead to the most beautiful relationship with my body. I loved myself like I always wanted to be loved. I shared what I learned with friends with everyone I could because it made me feel so good. 

Things were beautiful but for some reason not completely flowing. There was still some stagnancy and something missing.

I was still hiding from my sensuality. I was afraid of it still. I couldn’t just jump back into having people see that part of me it was too scary.

And one day my life blew up and I felt like I had lost everything

My whole world crumbled. I felt more broken and lost than ever before. I was terrified, alone, and scared with nothing. Every ounce of me was gone. 

That’s where all this began.

I started back at zero. I had to make the decision to go back to the things I was doing before but I wasn’t going to let them traumatize me. I would not be taken advantage of. I had this unbreakable relationship with my body and no one would shake that. I began to explore my sensuality again from a place of honoring it and not exploiting it. 

I continued doing all the healing work I had accumulated over the years  as well as rediscovering this thing I had lost and wow… it was the most empowering, beautiful, difficult, horrifying time of my life. And I wouldn’t trade it for the world. I began to discover myself and heal myself in ways I never thought possible. 

I healed my body, my anxiety, depression, ptsd, insomnia, physical and emotional pain, numbness, and sooo much more.

This thing I thought had hurt me was the very thing that saved me 

I incorporated sensuality into the healing practices I was doing and that was it! That was the missing key. Slowly but surly all the toxic things in my life began to disappear. The things that were not meant for me just kept falling out of my life and were replaced with the most divine beautiful things. Talk about learning how to surrender! 

And I could feel again! I could feel in my body, my emotions, my everything. It was all coming alive with each thing I released, each discovery, each moment of surrender. 

 I was able to enjoy every single bit of life like I never had before and my body completely healed and renewed in a way I could not believe. 

Life was just handing me everything I desired and more. It was all from clearing the blockages of what was holding me back, and experiencing life from pure pleasure and living in my sensual femininity. 

I knew I was onto something that could help every single woman out there because every woman I know has had this sensual part of themselves either repressed, taken advantage of, or exploited. And no one is talking about how to create a divine relationship with that part of a woman that honors and respects this part, it’s just misunderstood and looked down upon.

I can 100% say this is what women need to heal and feel that authentic wholeness and aliveness. We need you in your power.

 I’ve taken all of the things I’ve learned from experts,  researched, and spent thousands of hours doing to heal myself and I want to teach you how you can do this too! 

If I can, anyone can. 

You can too

You deserve to meet the real you. The world needs you

Follow me on instagram @karasingson